WIM ONLINE Greenlight Review
OGR 06/11/2014Hi Aureo,I was very encouraged to see this posted on time, and presented well. In terms of your conceptualisation of the city etc. I think that perhaps the Japanese motifs in your artist's work are dominating and encouraging you to make a 'Japanese/Chinese' city, instead of perhaps thinking about the kind of city/structures that Cliff would produce - I think the use of masks is fascinating - and mask can indeed be architectural, as in:http://i.livescience.com/images/i/000/027/546/original/easter-island-heads.jpg?1337958102But is you look at Cliff's ceramics, she does have a preferred vocabulary of shapes and she very obviously has a preferred colour scheme etc. I think you need to imagine that Cliff is pushing those preferences through the design of this city, as opposed to you pushing your preference for Chinese culture through the design of the city. Obviously, Cliff is influenced by this ethnicity herself, but at the moment it does feel as if this is your city, as opposed to the city you've created in collaboration with Cliff.Can I suggest that you do a 'shape extraction' exercise - in which you first identify all the shapes that Cliff uses - and turn these into simple silhouettes. Once you've done that, think about combining these silhouettes to create more complex forms that are nonetheless really 'Cliff' in terms of their appearance. I suggest too that you colour pick from Cliff's work until you establish a colour pallete that associates with Cliff unmistakably. Once you've done that, start adding colour to your thumbnails; I just think that a city designed by Cliff would be quirkier, and more strange (a place of orange trees and geometric shapes...)So, in summary, I think your travelogue and thumbnails describe 'your' city, as opposed to the one Cliff would design, and I think you should go back to her range of work and envision something a bit more 'out there'!