STS; Online Greenlight Review
OGR 21/01/2016Hi Aureo,To be honest, you've put together a story which is a classic example of 'what not to do'. If you really look at your story, it actually makes no difference whatsoever that you've got a lighthouse keeper or a windmill in it; the lighthouse keeper is generic character and the windmill is just a location, as opposed to location that is specifically a windmill. You've essentially written a story - perhaps the type of story you prefer - and squished the various elements into it. Remember the briefing? Remember the basic idea of story coming from character?Personally, I think you've been very lucky with your 3 components, because there seems like such a beautifully obvious connection there... If was thinking about a lighthouse keeper and his character, I might think he's a guy who likes to be solitary, who likes to be up high and is used to the wind. If a lighthouse keeper had to choose another kind of building in which to live, I can imagine that a windmill might suit him very well.I want you to try this exercise again and actually think about the story components you have; ask yourself basic questions: for example, what does a windmill do (it mills flour, or it can create electricity). What does a lighthouse keeper do (he keeps ships safe at night, he is a protector, his is a loner...) What do keys denote? The opening up of things. The locking up of things. A key can mean knowledge.You might have a character who becomes a lighthouse keeper during the course of the story. You might tell a story about two lonely people living in the tops of their respective towers (the lighthouse and the windmill) and how a relationship between them blossoms... It's clear from you current story that you've sort of come up with the kind of plot that you instinctively like, but I'm asking you to come up with a story from these three components that grows naturally from connects them. Can I suggest that you take a look at some of the other OGRs for some examples of people doing just that.